While I Was Stuck in an All Day Training Session

I have been doing nothing but getting caught reading funny emails today. Now I share, then you vote and the winner will get a prize. Promise.

First up - Amy. Here are her entries:
"I wish i wasnt wild. everytime im wild on weekdays i say to myself...self, why are you so wild on weekdays? Its not good for you or your career. and then I say...well self you are who you are and tennille makes you do weird thing like chew apple flavored tabaccy from a wierd asian that is in love with her. so i guess that summs it up. baaaaarrrfffff."

"Im not feelin so hot. I just projectile vomited in the bathroom at work. I met tennile for a beer at redhook alst night and that turned into 3 and then we were on a karaoke mission!! we went to a place called tony's by sluggers. it was weird but full of dudes which was ok. then we sang alot and got falled in love with of course. i think we have a fishing date with these dudes or something. we stayed there till 2 and then I drove the DJ home. yea what? yea. umm i want to go to sleepy town. how were your last nights? "

Please press 1 to vote for Amy as Funny Person of the Day.

Next up is David:
Entry 1: just had a guy tell me to "stick it in my butt". haha. i laughed in his face. He turned red, and stormed out. He was asking abunch of questions about his mom's accounts, and he didn't sign. I said "can't give info to someone that doesn't sign."

"okay, does my sister sign?"

I can't give ANY info to you, because you're not on the accounts. I'm sorry.

stick it in your butt, buddy!

What was that?

"I said STICK IT IN YOUR BUTT!"

"HAHAHAHA! seriously? haha. havea great day, sir!"

Entry 2 (from yesterday, but still funny):
Jennie just told me to buy a new car instead of tires. i asked what kind of new car I could buy for $120 (price of tires)... she gobbled, hiked her muffins into her pants, and walked away...haha

Please press 2 to vote for the D Train - CHOO!

Lori is next:
"If you go forward with sending her, we'll have a little "one on one" with her so she doesn't throw us under the bus. (you do know what that term means, right? It's not just an Iowa thing)

I went to PT this am so we had Josh do first half. I called Kristi at 8 am and told her to call him and have him come over. She said, "I'll try". WHAT THE HAY? (That is Iowa)"

"Princess Bluetoe, not to be confused with Princess Bluetooth"

"OK, I had to listen to how Kristi is excited about going out tomorrow with people she doesn't know. I said that's good to have a social life outside the computer.

She said that's a social life. I said there is no interaction. Yes, there is. No, you don't see reactions and hear laughter and see faces.

Yes, it's a social life but you don't know Lori because you're not into that.

OK, sit in front of the computer in your nasty house coat, eat food with your mouth open, fart, and scratch yourself because it's a grand social interaction"

Press 3 to vote for my boss.

Airick's up:
"Smoothe like the extra skin on an old ladies bottom" - He get's number 4 if you want to vote for him.

My Turn:
Nothing funny that I've typed but I DID face plant a glass door. That counts for something. (I'm #5...vote for me pleath thanksbye)

Now you vote. Go!